Monday, May 10, 2010

Mother's Day

Mother's Day must be the strangest of all holidays in my world. I don't love it and almost wish that we could do without TV, card aisles, or even church around this time of the year. I hate that somehow just because you have a child in your cart with you, you get this extra day of "special" that people without children - often times for a variety of reasons - don't get. I guess I just know too many people who would like to be moms and aren't. And those feelings are still way too raw in my own heart to jump on the bandwagon of overpriced Hallmark cards on a made-up holiday.
Having been a "mom" for 3 years now with this holiday, it doesn't really get any less strange as the years go by. Anyone who follows this blog knows that I'm a Mother who has yet to give birth to a child. But, nonetheless, I have these 2 crazy blessings who refer to me as "Mommy" ( at least the one who talks) that take up most of the thoughts in my brain every waking moment of the day.
This year having this 3rd crazy blessing actually inside of me, Mother's Day got even weirder. I've always love and respected birth moms more than I could ever put into words, and carrying a child myself has made me respect them even more. The kind of love that says "I want to give you the best you could have in life, even if that's not me" is unbelievable. To know that Creed takes up as many thoughts in my life as Cadence and Caleb Shaun makes me think of our birth moms almost daily. To know that they felt their babies kick, and move, and have to pee in the middle of the night - several times a night - and have back aches, and more body changes than should be discussed on a blog, and still make the unselfish decision to give that baby to us - or anyone else who has an adopted child - is mind blowing to me. It's the kind of love where we lay down ourselves for another person and the only person who I can compare it to is Jesus. Pre-children, He's the only person outside of my own parents, who ever gave me a gift at such a huge cost to themselves. Post-children, we have 2 birth moms in our world who fit into that "unselfish love" category.
I don't know what I'm trying to say here really except that I didn't get a corsage to wear to church (thank God), and there were no presents (except for one from my mom), I cooked our lunch just like any other Sunday, and I didn't even take the Bruster's gift card that they gave away at church because I never participate in the "mother's day give-aways" - although I did get out of dirty diapers for the day :) - but I am grateful to be a Mom and don't take it lightly that it's my responsibility - along with Chris - to help these little people that God has entrusted us with to turn out to be people who grow up to love the Lord and continue to grow His kingdom regardless of what kind of success that looks like from a worldly perspective.
I guess if Mother's Day can turn me all introspective and make me a little more grateful it's not so horrible after all - although I'd still like to do without the cards, presents, and flowers associated with it :)

We celebrated Mother's Day this year thanks to some dear friends who gave us a swing set. We spent the entire afternoon after church in the yard with the kids playing on our newest form of entertainment. I'm so grateful for friends who bless you even when you don't expect it. The smile and excitement in Cadence first thing on a Sunday morning that makes her play in the cold in her pajamas is really one of my favorite things in the whole world! So, here are a few pics of our playing adventures and I'm sure there will be many more to come as the summer wears on.


EllieMae said...

I gotta come play too!!!

Luke & April said...

Love you Ash and your honesty!! Thank you for this post :) You are an incredible mom!!

Elizabeth said...

Unselfish love is something that everyone, everywhere needs and desires and yet so few receive. This post was an encouragement to me. Like April, I love you and your honesty... and your sensitivity to others. And I'm so glad that this year Creed is giving you a new love, appreciation, and thankfulness for 2 other very special people in your world.

And I'm thankful for Mother's Day in my life because it reminds me to be thankful for the unselfish love of our mom... she's definitely a gift!